Sometimes we need to go back beyond NOW (and here even)
(2015) As a clinician who sees a lot of people who think that IVF is the answer to their lack of family, I am well aware that nature is stopping them from a possible mistake. What they need to do is calm down and get well. Become baby ready. Consciously conceive.
I am very aware that what I did not know has hurt me and my family.
If only I had known . . This is my gift to you – what was known is lost.
It is also devalued as being ‘old wives tales’.
YET – who kept people well and happy – the mums/midwives and the older women who had seen it all before (much like the elephant matriarch keeping the herd alive through knowing where the water still may be in a drought). What the older (grand)mothers know often gets lost as the younger ones all think that they are the first ones who ever…(ask any adolescent about what their parents know).
I wrote ‘What Dads Can Do’ in 2005 as I was horrified back then of what was happening through the advent of interference in pregnancy and the violence of modern birthing. What it was doing to the women who had so tenderly finally conceived…what is this all doing to their mothering and their ability to even care about this loss – as they are so scared of ??? pain? Feeling maternal? Being a woman? The preciousness of ‘me first’ has lost – ‘baby first’. The new practice of suing specialists has meant the baby is only one of the considerations – not the main event in all the high tech/modern management of what is essentially a private sanctuary – within the womb and the exit into life as we know it.
Why do we even become a parent?
Is normal what we really need?
‘Do no harm’ had been lost as so many women are freaked out about what a test, scan or specialist said. Mothers and their babies are the ones most hurt in the fear based monopoly of the modern birthing culture. What of life post birth? Who is there to help new mum whose baby was drugged up and missed its cocktail of love hormones (as mum did) and is not bonded (as mum isn’t) and is not primally attached – as mum also is not – due to all seeing the ‘experts’ and the ‘specialist’ as being the way love and mothering has always won – why is there such an emphasis on being born alive – of course this will happen – and more likely to also be happy if done undisturbed as we can – and without the drama and expectation of failure…what about the connection mum and bub for the rest of their lives – was this not also important?
Listening to experts and their emotive manipulations is one way to be a pregnant mum, but may not the way to ensure great babies, happy families, or a strong next generation. What can you do? Become informed. There are those who are naysayers. Ask yourself – is it natural? Are we supposed to be eating this? Are there numbers on the label? Does what I am to eat HAVE a label?
PLEASE- DO NO HARM
